Who do we look for and how are we found.
Half the fun of trawling through the profiles and pictures @DD is trying to figure out what thought process went through each member’s minds as they chose their way of representing themselves to others. I certainly have my own opinions which I may add in later in response to some of yours. I have chatted about this with a few on this site, but I would like to open up the forum to a wider point of view, IE: guys with whom I would generally not connect. Just some considerations are: the moniker (the name used to distinguish individuality) written profile (heavy on detail to none at all) the cover picture, the basic description (height, weight, preference, etc) the gallery pictures and the choices of these which to lock if any.
I do have interactions here through these blogs, and I get winks and messages, for the most part very brief, but sometimes longer and very nice messages. In terms of winks and/or messages, I respond to them all. If it's a wink, I usually give a simple "thanks!", but for longer messages with questions or thoughts then I try to be thoughtful and put some effort into my responses.
I've been thinking about your post and question, "guys whom I would generally not connect". I often wonder if guys are genuinely trying to connect, why would they leave everything blank, and then write, "ask me". Hun? If I were on the hunt that kind of profile would not get a foot in my door. Fitness and running are my hobbies, so if you're 5'5" and 300lbs, we probably would not have a lot of things we find interesting in common--just giving subtle things like height and weight help flesh out a story along with stating a preference (e.g., I don't like 'em over 50, or please, no one under 30). Stating a preference I think is good, but stating a whole bunch of dislikes I would find off putting. If you're bothered/annoyed that someone sends you a wink, then you're probably not the kind of spirit that I would want to be around. BTW, since I'm ornery, if your profile states, "don't send winks", I'll, for sure, send you one.
I see some variation of the quote that bearlyy posted about the dislike of cock and ass pics written in the profiles here--and this is where the self-serving part comes into DD for me. When I click on the home page, the profile pics that I'm drawn to are the cocks and asses. In fact, when I click on the home page that's all I see, and when I've explored all those, then the facial/body image pics come into focus--there's definitely an order from there, facial hair and body hair pics will get me, men of color, silver dads. If it's a profile pic of a young man, I won't open it. I know it's ageist, but for me there's zero interest. If a young man messages me or is on the list of visitors to my profile, I'll respond and/or check out of the profiles. And more often then not, they are all hot in their own way. As an example of my preferences, RJ, a frequent posted here to these blogs, had a real handsome face pic of himself posted on his profile page. It was nice, but then he put his sweet fat uncut cock pic up again. That made me very happy--I love that pic. :) Here's a profile and pic that I'm digging as of late: http://www.daddydater.com/NYButtmaster/ (Calgon take me home!)
I love the monikers, and some here are pretty funny; a good moniker will make me read the profile. As for my own, when I created the profile, I just thought I would be breezing through and little effort went into something more descriptive or clever (not that I could come up with a fun one if I tried). At the least, it's very accurate as I'm one stupidly furry guy. I have my ass pic up on one other site--it's been there for a few years. I took it down and put up a picture of me taken at Joshua Tree. It's a fun pic taken right at sunset with a full moon rising and Joshua Trees in the background, This guy from South Africa wrote that he loved that pic, but I got so many messages saying, "nice pic, but I like your ass pic better", or, "put your ass pic back up" that I just left the ass up <grins>. Granted, I'm not Brad Pitt, and I don't shatter mirrors when I walk by, but it least I know to give 'em what they want. My pic is just one of reciprocity, if you like it, great!, if not, there's plenty here that should be to your liking. I'm not here to satisfy what someone thinks should be posted.
As I write this, I realize that my self-serving motivations are not too different from others here. We all have a certain itch and I'm sure that we all just pull out of this site what we need to scratch that itch.
For me: First at least a bit of forethought in picture selection is…. almost a must. A great body, a great smile, almost always gets my attention even if it is done as a selfie or in a bathroom mirror.
Then I check out The Basic Three ‘P’s- their Proportions, Preferences & Point of location.
Next, I read the Profiles (an additional ‘P’). True- some go on and on daring you to finish or be finished with. If I read something that shows a brain is working I might contact them. There is nothing to loose in doing that especially if they are far away. (I am honored and grateful when guys conact me... and always tell them so.) I have met a number of local guys for coffee. A small number were not who they said they were. So, we had a nice afternoon cup of Joe and we both met someone new. (next profile) Most were real and nice people with whom we have had many public meetings, meals, and chat from time to time. A very, very small number of these develop a mutual connection- a spark to peruse in a private meeting on a later date. I found them verbally intelligent and clever. They have usually been the most fun in bed or other places.
Then there are the rare beauties I got together with anyway. I probably only saw them once, but that was enough. With their looks- I had enough imagination for the two of us… or at least for me. (OK, there is one, I’d consider….. Well, I hope that one is reading this…)
OK, so, what are your experiences… successes and failures… and can you see any relationship to the way these guys presented themselves in their profiles?
Guys, try to choose photos that put you in your best light. Don't be limited to a BAD selfie.
Mostly I find only nondescript profiles. Examples 1) “Contact me…” or “Ask me-” Why would I do that if its all someone can offers. Probably not much in the sack or clever enough to electronically connect with. (next profile) 2) Only dick and ass shots- great for exhibitionists and voyeurs, but who cares about the person they are connected to… Perhaps it’s me… most look great, but few are ‘exceptional.’ (next profile) 3) “New here, just checking out the site”- Cool, why not… same story after a year… It’s gotten old (next profile) 4) Starting off by giving you conditions- I guess that’s fine... for co-dependents. (next profile) 5) (except when it is a couple’s profile… I like that) Pictures with more than one guy in it. I am sure the profile belongs to the less interesting one. (next profile) 6) Pictures where the subject is less than 20% of the image- I'm not into connecting with a tree…. or at least not sexually. (next profile) ........
I sometime wonder why someone should upload a pic of an untidy bathroom?
I like pictures that are intended, even more if they don't show showing all, erotic takes.
Hairs make me shiver,
long texts don't (mostly).