Buddy Requests

Perhaps I am just old fashioned or cranky again this morning but I find the sending of buddy requests by total strangers to be annoying. If we had chatted for awhile or emailed back and forth of course I would accept your buddy request.

But when I get an email saying Perfect_Stranger sent you a Buddy Request I think WTF is that. So I go look has he signed my guestbook, nope. Have we exchanged emails, nope. Did I talk to him in the chatroom, nope. Then why the heck does he want to be my buddy? I dunno, you see because we have never communicated with each other.

I have actually met some very nice men from here and communicated with a bunch of others. But I find that the blurring of the value of words to be disconcerting. And I don't mean just on this website. I have several hundred "friends" on Facebook but how many of them could I call on in an emergency? Probably 2 or 3 at best. Buddy to me isn't as strong of a word describing the relationship between two people but it does mean to me someone you would be comfortable going out for a drink with.
It is

It is a new year and I like to start fresh. I love the Community Blogs which is why I am on reddit. Communication is how we connect. Thanks to all of you for connecting.
By txholdup | 01/03/2016 09:03 AM | 3 comments
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  • I call these people collectors, for that is all it is about, collecting as many "Buddies" as they can. The number at the top of their page makes 'em feel good...
    johnmac62 01/04/2016 02:42 AM
  • Thank you for posting this! So it isn't just me!!
    Some time ago, in another forum I'd just joined, someone who I didn't know, neither from reading his posts or answers to my threads, wanted to be buddy with me. Asit all was still quite new for me, I answered, apologized for my bad english and asked why he wanted to be my buddy.

    The answer was an angry runt against all people who didn't share the views of a true free NY-citizen, the only real free people ... free even to offer friendship to those - like me - who didn't deserve it.

    Well, I was glad I did ask!
    art4you 01/03/2016 07:02 PM
  • I believe that the broad interpretation of ‘buddy’ is stretched generationally. We who have had ‘pen-pals’ with whom we exchanged hand written letters, put them in envelopes, completely addressed them, stamp them, and put them in the post-box for pick-up have developed deeper meanings for the words ‘pal, buddy, & friend.’ These were not people we would collect like baseball cards or commemorative Elvis plates from the Franklin Mint. What came before the ease of internet communication was less about quantity than quality. The effort that was required to communicate created its own natural selection. Now that the connections between people are just about effortless, it generates an ability to bend credibility. Sure, one can lie about one’s self in a letter and send out pictures of others as opposed to who they really are. However, now in the digital age it takes no more effort than just a click to develop any kind of false persona.

    The internet within its great praise allows for and even encourages the creation of phantom character actors on phantom stages in far larger proportion than past media. So, it is not who is a buddy, or who is liked, or who is friended that matters. It is the number of names collected that is the goal. It is this shallow abundance that is substituted for the personal esteem of true interpersonal connections. When guys send a buddy request based upon little to no information about themselves or you for that matter here @DD or other places they are more than likely collecting names to increase their numerical value and not to add tangibility to them or you.

    I simply note in my profile that my buddies are real people, with real names, with whom I regularly communicate. Most buddy request come from guys who are not willing or cannot read the profiles of others. I simply thank them for the request but decline it in a nice way.
    MachineToole 01/03/2016 03:19 PM