losing a pet

I see a lot of photos with someone's pet in their photos and I know how loved some of these friends of ours can be...Sonny, my cat was only 5 years old, he was loving, liked to sleep with his nose in my armpit...made me laugh at his antics, made me nuts when he would sit on my chest at 3am and just stare at me and then quietly meow at me to get up...which I always did (I was the Pavlov dog apparently) and then I would move into another room and lay on the futon, and he'd go back to sleep...he ahd done what he set out to do...last night he was hiding around the house but I could here him panting heavily...I knew something was up, aso frantically searched for a vet who was open in Vegas on a Sunday night...my friend drove me while I held him on my lap and comforted him as best I could..and as we pulled into the parking lot of the vets. I realized he had just died.

It broke my heart, losing this little friend, it was a blood clot, they thought...I came home, found all his toys, his scatching post, everything that would remind me of his not being there and gave it away to friends with cats...and yet, all evening, from the corner of my eye I would see him, running, hiding...being the funny cat he was..even this morning I missed the meow (get up, get up). Some friends recommended I immediatly get another pet...nope, I am done...when people break your heart, you can grow from that, you can get over it, you can have the anger then the acceptance...but when sweet furry animal who only loves you...leaves like this, there is nothing one can do...but miss them...

I'm so sad in Vegas today...sorry to dump this on you guys, but this one hurts and I just thought I'd remind everyone of what our little friends mean to us...


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  • My condolences. The unconditional love of a dog or cat is truly unique and can never be replaced. In time I hope you will find comfort in the blessing of your cat and the joy that he brought you. Some day your heart might be ready for another special friend, but take your time. You will know when you are ready.

    Wheels
    Wheels55 05/24/2012 11:09 PM
  • ive two poosi cats also.elder is Symona other one is Dulsy. then u have 3 friends for ur happy. dont worry my dear.
    Rayan 05/24/2012 05:01 PM
  • I think you should "re-think" your position on not adopting another pet. I see that gesture as honoring the Cat you had. It is not a replacement but another soul to love. I lost two terriers within a month and said the same thing, until a friend told me how many animals are homeless and suffering. I have two rescued airedales in my life and they don't replace, but they have won my heart in a little over a year. Good luck. Losing a pet is the WORST thing.
    Duncster999 05/23/2012 08:49 AM
  • Hello my Friend so sorry about you buddy Sonny ..Jake x
    JAKER77 05/22/2012 04:15 AM
  • i feel your pain buddy.... my dog of 15 yrs old died suddenly. i was on the way to the vet, just like you and while i was walking down my sidewalk, GOD took her from me. I screamed and cried so loud the neighbors came running out to see what happened. NOBODY knows that feeling unless they have gone thru it like you and I did. MY deepest sympathy goes out to you.
    carymannc 05/22/2012 04:15 AM
  • Thank you, How...as always your eloquence soothes me
    polarbare 05/21/2012 11:51 PM
  • We seem to think we need to distinguish a difference between the bond we have with a human- to our connections with our furry, feathered, scaled, etc. companions. They are all loved ones, each in their own special way, each with their own special gifts that we hold more valuable than any possession. I believe we learn so much about ourselves from all those with whom we share a great love. (It even has a clinical name: CER, conditioned emotional response) But there is no clinical word or even just 'a word' for true loss or a broken heart. Art can come close, but it is only our inner senses that brings back a warm memory and the burning anguish.

    For all those lost by the loss of loved ones:
    May your memories be long and your pain be short... but never let the pain go completely... It is their embrace of love they left behind.
    How

    I'm here for you my dear friend.
    MachineToole 05/21/2012 11:14 PM
  • Thank you, Kelley, Hippy Gypsy, Spirtwalker, EverysoOften (not your real names, I'm guessing,) but the tenderness and caring you sent me has touched me deeply. Kelley, I am so sorry for the loss of your pal, too....we will all get over this, but we will always see them, just out of the corner of our eye, and we will smile at the sight of them, however fleet it is.

    Jim
    polarbare 05/21/2012 11:08 PM
  • Oh, baby, I'm balling like a little girl here....I also just lost my cat of 6 years to kidney failiar.....I still see him all throught the house. His 2 brothers, 1 sister and my dog are lost without him. I still can't move his bed and none of the others will sleep in it. It was the most heart wrenching thing I've ever went through, seeing him die. The worst part, for me, was I couldn't stop it, I couldn't help him. I took him into my home and gave him all the love he wanted and in the end I couldn't come through. I couldn't love him as much. I am SO very sorry for your loss. Just know that here in Chicago, I'm going throught the same pain and vacantness as you are. I didn't think I could ever feel that kind of physical, emotional, and mental pain until now. It hurts so fucking bad. Much love to you, sweet man. You are in my heart tonight.
    kelleysiland 05/21/2012 09:36 PM
  • So sorry for your loss of a beloved pet. I am sure with time will come a peace of knowing you gave that little one the best home ever, much love to you... take care my friend.
    hippygyspy 05/21/2012 08:27 PM
  • Be grateful for the love and friendship, you’ll never forget nor should you. Our pets are our family.
    You will be in my prayers tonight.
    Spiritwalker 05/21/2012 08:22 PM
  • Oh God! Reading you post brought back a flood memories of a dog we had for 13 years.

    I had just retired from the Army. My kids wanted a pet and it was Christmas time. I took the kids out shopping and they asked if they could stop at the pet shop "just to see..." We left with a miniature poodle (cream on his back). To this day I believe the kids had already been to that pet shop and had in mind this newborn dog who was the most forlorn looking of animals (all he needed was love).

    The dog's name was "Sir Terrance Bandit Junior." The kids nicknamed him "BJ." He was definitely a lap dog. He took especially to my oldest boy - would sleep under the covers and could never find a place warm enough.

    BJ became the center member of the household. Everything revolved around BJ. He had regular medical check ups, had medications to take, and was blind as a bat. I will never forget the scene of him catching a glimpse of a big dark haired cat on the top of the fence out in the back part of the house where we had the pool. He went from one side of the back fence to the other, putting his paws up on the decorative logs sniffing the air looking for that cat. Of course the cat moved as BJ did... at one point their paths crossed and the cat was within 10-feet of his face. But BJ could not see him (I think dogs are color blind and really only sense movement). BJ could not see the cat but the cat saw him... The cat let out with a wicked yelp, scared the hell out of BJ who made the fastest and funniest escape running across the still-covered pool and made it safely inside the slider to the kitchen. His little back end was moving so fast as he ran like hell. Big coward! We laughed for hours!

    Our little dog also had a heart problem and as he got older it worsened. Seems like one of the chambers in his heart just disintegrated. We knew he was not doing well one morning because he coughed up blood as he tried to eat. It was so disheartening to see him suffer. We rushed to the vet and gave him as much comfort as we could. Finally, he took his last breath and all we were left with were the memories, the pictures and the laughter and joy he brought into our lives. He is dearly missed to this day.

    My heart goes out to you because I know - as do the members of my family - how painful the loss of a loving pet can be. The grief likely will not go away soon - I still grieve for our little dog BJ and it has been 6-years since he passed away. We all grieve in different ways - for me, the pain in the loss of our BJ was no different than the death of my parents or of my much loved favorite uncle just a year ago.

    Tears well up as I write these words and reflect on the loss of our dog. I know the feeling of loss you have and wish you the very best as you adjust to the loss of your loved pet...

    everysooften
    west Michigan

    ps - my email is poodlebj@yahoo.com
    some have asked what the "bj" part means... it always gives me an opportunity to tell the story about our miniature registered dog named BJ...
    everysooften 05/21/2012 07:51 PM