How Did Henry VIII Wipe His Ass?

He didn't! EWWW! Wipe his OWN ass, that is. He had a "Groom of the stool." We're not talking bar stool here. Talk about your glamor job! Wiping the kings ass? Who could ask for more? So, what if he is a bit chubby. So, what if he is morbidly obese. What do you say? I beg your pardon, your Grace but I'm getting tired of putting up with your shit. You might be found in the morning minus your head. Gives a whole new meaning to giving head.